AGAIN

AGAIN

need to speak
but cannot
find the words
seems to me
I have
none to utter

conclude
they must be, cannot
but be, hanging
out
on the line
washed, rinsed
spun alnost dry

needed them
to explain
how it is
I cannot love, do
not live,
am seriously unable
to stave off this pain

and now you tell
it is
   all repetition, forever
recycled,
as
   bad as it gets,
good as it is ever
going
    to be

a project of balance,
even symmetry
         (hardest, most
unforving type
monstrous
in its need to be)