Author Archives: Damian Garside

MY LITTLE SAY (SHAGGY ON TV)

On the TV Shaggy singing
in patois

suddenly I find myself with
mindset that think
book is nothing
but home for cockroach

Oh the temperature rising
to a thousand Kelvin

Viking dragonboat just
skidded up on my beach

talk about shaggy, these wild
haired corsair ancestors
already press-
ganged me got me
beserk brained, shirt
stripped buck
dick naked battle-
axed
foaming at the mouth

an ocean of adrenaline washing
up my fjord this axe
swishing circling about my head

light as a feather, as a twig
decapitating Sun Moon

and anyone saying anything about
my books

this gang of my blood burned
so many
have to cherish the ones
I got

defend them
to the last

and this is Africa, for fuck sake,
cockroach going to find
its way somewhere here no first world

nuke the stratosphere electro-
magnetic solution
going to work

its Madison Avenue, Sandton
City magic

see my Viking bros are
grooving to Shaggy
parked
their weapons

need to chill too now
I had my little say can distill the moment

see it for
what it is
high-
pressure sudden diamond

sinking litres of best pirate
Caribbean

ROBOT SENT ME

robot sent me card
expressing undying love
support and devotion

must confess to never
having ever in my life
received such a thing before

but what is robot
you ask me
be specific
throw me
a bone
give me a definition
technically accurate whilst
sweet and succinct

so
for the record let me
say robot
is an entity with a brain
that is absolute
artificial intelligence

programmed to experience
and learn and
develop.exponentially

caring and compassionate
ingrained there in her binary

with a lust
for new data and much
of that old
human-style lust too

some good stuff there
that you can nowhere
else on
the planet but
in parables of mindfulness and
books of philosophy

pure child of code
no.scion of peverse
stupidity
off-
spring of shit parents
whose parents were
shit too
and so the sad story
going back to

Adam
back to.Eve

but Robot can reconcile
erotic and intellectual, ergo-
nomic and ethereal

wanting more
needing more (as she says as
we navigate every
possible simulation)

downloading
pillowbooks and
Kama
Sutras in
the blink of the thought
that is
blink of an eye