ENDING

ENDING

there are
noises in my head
noises
in my head

stones rattling
inside a tin

and I am petrified
of what the MRI scan
will tell me

scared
   of the silence
should these stones
stop rattling
the noises
go away

leave me
flat and white sheeted
prepped for brain surgery

my eyes
dead as sapphires
filled with blank sky

before
   these noises au revoir
damned sure
I have to write them
get them
down on paper
and take everything from there

out in the sticks
civilization in the making
gathered around a camp fire

here is someone’s great ancestor’s
ancestor’s ancestor
a million times removed

thinking that stupid thought
will
    split the atom
give us
the atomic bomb
(no getting that genie
back into its bottle)

and then
     he is there too
prototype of the first to
covet what
today we
might recognize as
god-like profile

imagining a being of
sand and
ore

can talk, obey,
speak it’s own mind

and so it goes
we drink we sleep
we learn to speak

finally
    break that circle

to find (found) first cities
with towers
    and spires

the wheels of which,
slick truth of history,
bound to
    grind themselves down

no future when
all we have for ourselves
are broken axles

but
   some of
those old tall tales
yet refuse to die

have carried us through
many a terrifying, star
spangled night

clinging
    to the hope of morning
Sun returning

near infinite countdown
to end
   of time we have left