nuclear – poems 2 die for

IT TOO DISAPPEARED

here I am
dining on irradiated cat
all five beloved housepets
because it was
them or me

all because someone
they could go
bar room brawler
strong-arm delicate, negotiations
and then thirty thousand
megatons took
it upon themselves
to say “fuck that”

I suppose
it adds to our kudos
that we wiped
ourselves out
using the
key equation
of the Universe

which Einstein
wrote in chalkdust

or so the story goes
adding to
every deceased idea,
song, poem, prayer
tale told
my an idiot
ever told

though there
were amongst us
those
who claimed

we construct it
all through the
power
of thought

and so
when we went
it too disappeared

RIDDLE

drop me from
from nearly thirty thousand
feet

or maybe
more aptly
two thousand and one
plus which
in Arabic numerals
at least will
tally up
to two thousand
and three

the sneakiness of three
plunging us
headlong
via Oedipus, foot leg and
stick of the Sphinx
into the heart
of riddle

whose subject
framed by that odd
counterfactual
joke
of time

we now seen
born
held up to the Sun
but dreaming
of Moon
strangely named Moons

Phobos, Deimos (Oh, I
mean
Demos
Titan, Europa, Miranda,
plus others
as well

five listed here for
every toe on
your foot, finger
on your hand

held up to the Sun, ball
of such Uranian energy

watch him
long for that furnace

given
the slightest opportunity
doomed to there
walk, hobble,
crawl

EMBROIDERY

It only lasted a few minutes
but was a quite
breath-taking bit of
fire-embroidery

that, however,
was months ago
as I look for blankets
papers and rags
to create a nest
warm enough for
me to have a hope
of surviving
this winter

at least
for a few days

too cold to eat (if
there were food)
too deep below
freezing point
to put pen
to paper
(or even just
pick up a pen
before even thinking
of putting to paper)

and so little paper left
for burning
most vanishing in
the major epic firestorm
when every
firestorm joined

not
without faith, I prayed
hard and prayed thrice daily
that the embroidery
return
finish what
was begun.

AMEN TO THAT

the spaces
between words

letting me hedge
my bets
with you threatening
to go
full Plato
get universal with me

can’t
allow that to happen

need to scratch around here
making my own noise
doing (as they say
in sixties-speak)
my own
thing

the light fading
and light, searing light
an intimate part of
my origin story

what saved me
in saving my father’s
seed

thoughtful fireball
suddenly at the heart of two cities
obviating the tactical need
for father flyboy, Mr Grand Slam,

to drop serious deathload
on temples and those
sweet bridges you see
painted on
porcelain

maybe catch some
vengeful ferocious flak
my brother
told me
without little boy and
his fraternal thermonuclear twin
(dropped on
that most Christian of
Far Eastern Cities)

he and I might
not be having
this conversation

you and I sort of making
acquaintance

whatever that
is precursor to
(the spaces
between words
throwing
a spanner
blowing us off track)

and yet
if we are, despite appearances
to the contrary, about to meld
go full Plato
before
some altar

would smile and say
Amen to that. Amen to that.

CADMUS

were given the instruction
to be bounteous and
multiply

as for beauteous
were given that manual too

and now you see
our seed proliferate
our deeds profligate

spreading
the open market of
our rationality across
every horizon, vista
to vista
high and low

and those teeth
we planted
how fertile they proved
to be

star seed springing up
mirror demons more
than ready
to come to blows
force the issue with us

breed,
split, chain react

teach us how the ultimate
physics of our protection
crazy virus of
our
desperate war for
preservation

will be
the destruction, the death of us

SCRIPTURE

thick smoke pouring
skyward indicating
target-rich environments

things
balanced on
a scalpel-sharp
knife edge
nuclear option
not least of all

and here I am in
the basement stack
a year before
we met
used to chat
in this exact place

half
a century ago

here I am
deep down in the
bowels of the University library
(the same
library destined
to burn)

reading
the Upanishads, wondering
about the nature
of consciousness,
transcendence and
this thing
they call the
soul

outside the thick rain clouds
hitting us with an
insane deluge
as they cross
the mountain

and
me diving deeper into
these sanskrit scriptures
(in translation)

losing all
sense of
space and time

the ghost presence of that
briefest moment
of being
together,

swirling about me
unseen, promise of
something
beyond special
never destined
to be

those thick clouds rising
above an expanse
of ferocious
flames

this is not going
to end well

chance that
what ends it
ends everything

so much
for all of us to lose,
we
played this so badly
so stupidly,

the laws of physics
that tell us
we are all
if small
matter

infinite energy
a small Sun a
flash of light of
miraculous intensity

and
crazy as it sounds, obessive
truly

the balance
slipping, tipping

thinking of you

something of the truth
of you there
in those scriptures

SO FAR

so you were born/
cloned to
protect our crowning
achievement

our ability to
split the atom release
planet destroying power

which have become
so widespread every
nation, family,
individual
owns at least one

bare minimum
essential for humanity to survive

for without
fear of mutual destruction
what might
keep us civilized?

to destroy everything
wipe out one’s neighbours

every citizen across
the globe’s inalienable right

testimony to
the vast advances
in wisdom and knowledge
we have made so far

LEGACY

“It is your destiny!” Darth Vader, The Empire Strikes Back

at me again
about all the time
on my hands

call it
free time
(corporate
joke whose
punchline I
don’t get)

spending time
killing time
writing ace poetry
winning
at Mah Jong

when I could be
working more profitably
making nuclear weapons

filling covering
the planet with them
to express
my innate sense
of manifest destiny

fireworks display
for the ages as you
would have
to agree

closest thing to the Big Bang
could me my huge legacy

WHOLE PACKAGE

this is my
box

my beautiful package
devised, constructed, fabricated
to enhance,
verify, verify, rectify
this most wonderful
of weapons

so many thousands pointed
at each other (every
megaton worth
millions)

so now we have
more than enough to go round
protection, satisfaction
for all
no one to go needy
we guarantee you your share

so just put them in this box
here according to the wording
looks so nondescript
but it’s
marvellous, glorious I swear

look how eager it is
to embrace,
sword-swallow each
pointed warhead

turn them into
art, sheer poetry, true
beauty
as they disappear

somewhere, anywhere, nowhere
who gives a flying f where
they went to
disappeared to

leaving us
cold and alone no hope
of
final winter
ultimate prophecy

not the case with
all those
other worlds in
their parallel universes

ours
somehow surviving
beating impossible odds
of so
doing, of our
contriving to do so

a blip
on a switch, screen
misread, word
mistranslated

they got the required treatment
the whole package as detailed

LOVERS

millions
were making love
when the bomb
dropped

a fat few megatons
vaporized them instantly

moment when
dream and desire
annihilated themselves

love and death
in dark exactitude
of intensity
so mirroring each
other

as if the species
was fucked from the moment it began

but
the poem still here

jury out
clock still ticking

lifetimes of love
still to resolve