OR DO NOT SMILE

OR DO NOT SMILE

came to see you
found you in mood
assertive yet contemplative

strolling along the beach
inner peace broodingly tempered
by some dark cloud momemts

only adding to my sense of your
backbone, resilience, tensile strength

or perhaps you were
as I had half expected
sultry, inviting,
familiar
simply sitting on the beige sand
taking in everything
perhaps waiting
    for he who is indeed legendary
beyond compare,
or perhaps
just isn’t, will dupe you
in a masterclass of
male manipulation

and then we saw each other
which was a delightful
surprise or
might equally not have been

it’s all about probability
what
     the Universe at
its smallest is
determined to
decide for us

lifting up mountains in
a million year
blink, alternatively
                 grinding down
   
   and there we have it
all that is
and was and will
forever be

openly there between us
and openly
                   not between us

nothing in the cosmos
we know of
           to bend
in opposite direction
               the rigid arrow
of time

unless as we see
here
     not just bending but
completely melting

and
    seeing all that was fixed
and figured
helplessly dissolving

we see each other smile, are
sunshine
     or do not see, or
do not smile at all
             


UNLESS THEY DID

UNLESS THEY DID

you wake up
it’s all
a dream

all the usual
clear lines of differentiation

unless
scriptwriter killed you off
at home
she, they
still waiting for you

one of those inept
final episodes
wrecking what
had been a great show,
truly memorable series

or maybe
they forgot you, overlooked you,
left you in subplot limbo
no hope of resolution

twist to
the tale they decided
not to run with knowing
it was all
about to be
cancelled

narrative development no
one cared about
cares about

unless they do
unless they did

NEITHER HERE, NOR THERE

NEITHER HERE NOR  THERE

sadly I have
forgotten you already

though a little bird
keeps reminding me
how razor smart you
were
   and how beautiful

something I have to tell you
before this poem
goes off
   the boil

it’s Christmas day after the day
after the day after tomorrow
I would wish
          you every joy
but we cannot risk climbing
out of our trenches
onbewapendt
     exposing our shared
humanity
risking all
that vulnerability

I can whistle the tune of
every tracks on those
albums
you gave me for
Xmas
    God knows how many years ago

and soon but not
together obviously we are
going to
    wake up dead finding
ourselves one
hundred
   percent spiritual
able to laugh
   (not earthbound resounding
seismic belly laugh
more celestial titter)

at all
those
      misunderstood signs, wrong
words, mistakes,

as far as
     eye can see landscape
of obstacle and
barbed
     wire

here where time is meaningless
and
     spanner in the works and
as a
consequence jammed
clockwork

but I did send
a dove with a message

if it reaches you if you
read it
        deep as I have tried to be
it is all neither here nor there

TAKES YOU BACK

TAKES YOU BACK

tell me
about simplicity

three chord song
garage band

haiku where
every breathing syllables
cut with
a scalpel

but there again complexity
structures with
levels nested
within
levels

incredible
architecture

you followed all
the arrows and
then were
surprised
to find yourself

facing
   you humming
a simple tune

you either never
heard before
or
takes you back

TAKES YOU BACK

TAKES YOU BACK

tell me
about simplicity

three chord song
garage band

haiku where
every breathing syllables
cut with
a scalpel

but there again complexity
structures with
levels nested
within
levels

incredible
architecture

you followed all
the arrows and
then were
surprised
to find yourself

facing
   you humming
a simple tune

you either never
heard before
or
takes you back

POEM IS WAITING FOR ME

POEM IS WAITING FOR ME

poem
is waiting for me

but I am not there
pen and
paper crying out

but no words, no letters,
nothing there
on the page
to remain
    unread

to add nothing,
exactly nothing

maybe
I should tell the poem
to switch itself
to go
automatic pilot

where I
feel that
there is nothing
to say, 
   no place to
start

poem can write itself
fill the page with
brilliance or
nonsense
whatever it feels
on the whim
of the moment
whatever it
    absolutely has
to say
   express from
its core, its heart,
plunder from the depths

find
   a truth to explore
simply
fill the page with

add
   its piece

to all that has
      been written, revered
and so much talked about

SAVED

SAVED

all those books burning
in that same library.
where before
things got messed
we used to chat
and I caught sight
of you once
strutting your stuff
in a giant white stetson

all those books
we both used
to read
    much oneupmanship
between us
for some sad reason

and we exchanging words
at a distance about this tragedy

but there
I am before I ever met you
outside such a storm
creeping across the mountain
the rain slashing down
across
the entire peninsula

me immersed in the Upanishads
reading the great text
on the return
       of the soul to the one
like drop into ocean

we
all one

and you my
forever one
though nothing close
to union

ever between us

somehow
that fire in my heart
always burning
consuming
      never going out